An Old Soul

I am 23 years old. But I feel 78. I pick up the baby and my back starts a painin'. When I sit down my knees creak ominously. I can feel nor' easters in my elbow days before they blow into town. My hair is falling out, I require a Victorian fainting couch bi-weekly, and I think the osteoporosis is causing me to shrink. 

Because my mind subconsciously thinks I am in my dotage, I accidentally bought a multi-vitamin designed for women over 60. And you know what whippersnappers? I haven't felt this spry in decades! Pass me the Metamucil and that afghan that keeps my ankles so toasty. 

78 is the new 23. 

The Wyoming Meth Project

Now that I live in Wyoming, the youtube ads that play before my video have a dark and scary message.
Gone are the commercials enticing me to buy shiny, new and improved stuff.

Now I am treated to this:

Hooray! I wanted watch a funny cat video and now I have images of meth-addled youths in my brain. I can see it now, kids across Wyoming: "Mommy what's a hustler?" These disturbing videos were created by the director of Requiem for a Dream, Black Swan, etc. Like Requiem for a Dream wasn't the best advertising to never do drugs; I have to see some girl slit her wrists before I can enjoy the breathy falsetto of Kay Perry.

Population of Wyoming, get off the meth! I don't want to see these ads anymore!